Thursday, May 16, 2013

The Summer of my 12th Year


I was 12 that summer.   My parents and I were spending a vacation in a remote mountain area in the north part of Colorado.  There was a small jewel of a lake on the western slopes of a ridge just off the continental divide close to Rocky Mountain National Park.  We had learned of the lake several years earlier when camping and exploring in that area.  A good sized cattle ranch, a boy’s camp and a fairly active logging operation shared that part of paradise.

We drove our old paneled truck, loaded with two weeks supply for the 3 of us, down a narrow rutted road into a small flat park with a spring flowing through it at the far edge where the trees and rocks took over again.  This was not a park in the sense of a developed recreation area, but of a flat high mountain meadow surrounded by forest.  It was a perfect host for our little camp set up near the stream close to the trail winding into the woods toward the lake and other inviting wonders we’d not yet explored in our many trips to that region.

Setting up camp always took a good bit of time.  My mom nested.  We moved rock, built a fire pit with seating about it made of large rocks and fallen logs.  Lots of ‘this goes here; no that goes there’ combined with the sound of the old hand saw and my mom pounding nails and stakes with intermittent pan clattering and discussions of what a perfect spot it was.  Part of the perfect spot was the placement of trees where my mother could string her rope for hanging wet towels and clothing and an old gas lantern or two.  They became the perimeter of our ‘home’ for the week.



My dad was a fisherman.  The lake was close enough for a daily jaunt or two, but far enough that a 12 year old would not wander to it alone.  Sometimes it was the 3 of us, sometimes just my dad and I.  I liked to fish.  I liked to cast the line and hear the reel spin.  I loved to see how quickly I could bring it back in.  I was much more of a stream fisher than a lake fisher.  Watching a bobber for lengthy stretches was not my long suit.  So I fish/explored.  It always involved getting wet.  It always involved noise and a few reprimands from my dad when the wet and noise interfered with the peaceful, dozy solitude of lake fishing. 

So, I discovered things. I had adventures. I dreamed and wrote stories in my head.  The art of story composing was part of my life.  It filled long stretches of time when I didn’t want to be discovered by those left in charge of the ‘baby’ of the family.  Story telling filled long nights when I was expected to stay quietly in bed regardless of the lack of sleep that has always characterized my life.  Storytelling could take the simplest of ‘not quite acceptable’ and make it enviable grandeur.  My mother had read to me from the time I was quite small: Alice in Wonderland, Through the Looking Glass, The Wizard of Oz, Little Women, Swiss Family Robinson, The Five Little Peppers, White Fang, Call of the Wild –these and more filled my mind with scenarios to build from.  They were as real as the stone and fallen logs of our outdoor living space.

One day on that vacation, I discovered the remnants of a home made raft hiding in the undergrowth.  By the time my mother wandered up to the lake and my father roused from his fishing stupor.  I was in the middle of the lake with a pole that could not reach the bottom.  While it was a small lake, it wasn’t small enough for them to reach me with anything.  My dad had a hundred foot rope in his tackle, but even when they tied a rock to it and he gave it a fast ball pitch, the rope fell short.  Trying to paddle with the tall thin pole that had gotten me to my spot in the center of the lake was futile.   My dad was pulling off his shoes and emptying his pockets when I got the idea of taking off my shirt and tying it to the pole.  ‘Half nekked’ I struggled to hold the pole in place.  The shirt caught just enough wind to ease me toward the bank.  It was ingenious; I deserved more praise than I got!  My dad got firewood out of it.



One day as we were cleaning up from breakfast, we were blessed with visitors to our solitude.  It was a family of three like our own who had hiked up the road in search of ‘Lost Lake’.  They also had a 12 year old – a boy.  They were from New England and talked funny.  They asked several questions about the lake, admired my mother’s set up and shared a few of their own stories from the trip they were on.  Mom and dad loved to visit and I was definitely not a shy child.  We offered to walk with them to the lake and they seemed grateful for the offer. 

I don’t remember any of their names, but I took it upon myself to make sure their son had a good time and learned all kinds of things about the wilderness of Colorado.  Yeah, I was that good!   When they finally started toward their own ‘little camper’ late in the afternoon, we felt we were parting from long time friends.  My mom offered to share our dinner as we had our lunch, but they wanted to be tucked in before nighttime.  They didn’t relish the thought of being out of their camper in the dark.  I thought that was strange.  We watched them wander back down the road where they came in that morning.  I spent a good portion of the rest of that trip constructing stories of how we would meet again some day in the future –a prince and his long lost princess – to be united in love forever.  It didn’t happen, but they were probably good, if sappy, stories.



My mom loved making a wilderness home if only for 2 weeks.  She would scour the surround areas for plants and make a garden of wild iris, columbine, mountain larkspur and other beauties.  When she was young her father had contracted TB and was sent to a isolation/treatment facility.  My grandmother, a resourceful and intelligent woman, the formally educated grand daughter of an Indian chief, sought a teaching position that would support her small family and was hired on at a tiny mountain town where her own children were schooled as a majority. 

There were kind mountain folk that stepped in and helped this young mother with her children and step-children.  One old man taught my mother and her brother survival skills and introduced them to the ways of respecting and living in the wild.  There was always a fondness in my mothers stories for the time spent there.  I’m sure it was a difficult life for my grandmother, but she made the children feel it was a great adventure.  And so camping was part of that adventure. 

Mom honored faithfully the teaching the old man had given.  One teaching was to never let a fire go out at night.  My mom had dad cut a supply of ‘keeper’ logs. Two large logs were place side by side on the coals at bedtime.  All night they would smolder and smoke.   On rare occasions, they would flame up and we’d hear mom out there adjusting them a bit.  In the morning she would move them apart some and fill the space with limbs,  small twigs and pinecones and soon a good fire for breakfast was started.  Our fire seldom went completely out during our stay.  The few times it did, we were blessed with critter visits that we weren’t overly fond of, but that made great telling in the future.

It was Thursday afternoon and we were leaving to go home on Saturday, but dad decided we needed to take a supply run into the nearest town –about 30 miles away.  Unknown to me it was my parents’ anniversary.  My mom made excuses and then gave in thinking dad had some sweet commemorative celebration in mind.  When we had tightened up the camp, put everything away, and set in some keeper logs, we climbed in the old truck and started off.  On the other side of the park, our trip came to an abrupt halt when we started to climb the little incline going out.  After a bit of time, my dad reappeared from under the vehicle – a familiar occurrence in our world- to inform us that the u-joint had gone out.  A short discussion decided we’d walk to the logging camp and see if my mom could get a ride into town to get the supplies.  The loggers agreed to take her and dad and I hitched a ride back to the road we were camped on and went back to our camp to wait on her return.  Around supper time, a logger came by to tell us the car parts store didn’t have what she needed so she had called my sister who would bring the part after her husband got off work.  Mom waited for them in Granby while we made supper and then settled into the tent for a little sleep, figuring they probably wouldn’t get there until the wee hours.  Dad had allowed the fire to burn out and said he didn’t need to keep a fire going all night to protect us.

I think I’ve told that story enough times.  The deer wandered in with their heads down and then panicked when they caught their antlers on the ropes my mom had strung.  It was a frantic “What the heck are we going to do?” moment or 5 as they banged into the side of the tent over and over in their terror.  They did of course finally find their way out.  And the first thing dad did was to build a fire.  Neither of us could go back to sleep and we sat up until my brother in law’s truck with the camper came rolling in a little after midnight. 

The babies were all asleep, so after a bit of visiting that included a variety of stories, the revelation that my dad had forgotten the anniversary completely and wanted fishing tackle, and my tale about the deer that brought ‘the look’ from my mom, I was left with the sleeping children while the four adults walked to the lake in the moonlight.  It wasn’t quite fair, but that’s the way of it.

Our vacation the year I was 12 has always been a fond and fun memory in my mental scrap book.  So many pictures stay in my mind, like in those books my mom would read and then pause to show me the accompanying picture before resuming the story.

Sunday, May 12, 2013

Mothers


God has blessed my life with mothers. 

Well, yes, there is that obvious thing.  I have a mother.  She is 95 years old going on 96 and I am blessed now by every year God gives.  She gave birth to me at a time when her own life was precariously balanced day to day.  I remember a face of laughter and a serving hand.  She loved a ‘grand to do’ and she was good at them.  She loved to fix people.  Sometimes people had their own ideas about being fixed.  She had a strong will and a creative mind.  I love my mom and am thankful for her.
My own life has produced five beautiful mothers.  They are as unique as each flower in a wildflower garden.  I see strength and stamina.  I see giving hearts but strong wills.  I see in all my daughters, pieces of myself yet, so individually crafted by the greatest planner-designer.
I believe it is our right as parents to bless our children.  For my daughter Katherine, I speak peace and clarity and space to let her dreams live strong.  For Rhonda, I would give contentment and the ability to meet the challenges of the day as a daughter of the great King.  For Jackie, I say open up the doors and let the creative out and it will make a place for itself.  Learn to breathe deeply and gaze quietly.  For Jonea, I speak patience to see the days and the dreams unfold and the ability to see each challenge as a chance to creatively bond with her creator.  For Amanda, I speak continued renewal and reward for the efforts.  I speak creative patience at seeing the future born each new day and in believing its divine origin. 
There are many things I pray for in my daughters’ lives.  These are tools that will help when the prayers are answered.  But I am thankful mostly for their motherhood.  They gave me many beautiful grandchildren who are also strong, opinionated, creative people.
My sister, Barbara is another mother I am thankful for.  My time at watching her mothering skills has been minimal and yet I see a pattern of grace and wisdom mixed with a bit of angst at times that has created her own individual cacophony of life.  And yet it is merely the tuning of an orchestra.  I wish for her the time and ability to hear the symphony of life as she mothers her own mother.
My older sister, who sees from afar these days, gave birth to 6 mothers.  These are also strong women who know both the harmony and dissonance of life.  They are incredible examples of woman who have faced adversity with grace and faith.  Three of these have, in recent years, reconnected to me and begun a journey that travels near by and often joins with my own meandering trail in life.  They have brought me laughter and understanding and unconditional love.  As a stand in, I bless them today.  
Linda you are a warrior child.  You do battle easily for others, but not so much for yourself.  I bless you with fellow warriors to stand by when the assaults come.  I pray for peace and confidence.  I pray that your creative problem solving will flower within your home and life to give joy and the deserved realization of your hopes and dreams.  I pray for physical strength to enjoy that realization.
Laura, you are a seeker of truth and resolution.  You are a peacemaker.  I bless you today with the calm belief that God's love is as vast and never-failing as your days.  His provision is a grand as your wildest dream.  His will is to bring you through the trials a complete, strong and contented woman.  When the road is hard, he is there always. When the days are sweet, he is there.
Cathy, you are a jewel.  You've come through fire and pressure to shine and sparkle.  You are a jewel in God's crown.  He is forming you into a lovely centerpiece of grace.  You have a willing and compliant spirit, but you're nobody's fool.  I bless you with a patient realization of God's awesome plan for your children, your grandchildren and your own life.  You are a flower that has been too busy to bloom and yet the time is near.  Be patient, be confident, be content.
On a wider scope, God has blessed my life with incredible mother/friends.  They care for me and about me in the heavy times.  They laugh with me and sometimes at me in the antics of life.  They bless and encourage and sometimes gently correct.  Their own little flocks are as diverse and as their appearances and abilities.  They are a strong influence on my thinking and doing.  There are too many to list and then you risk the chance of leaving one out that truly is a worthy recipient of honor.  So I shall do my best in the next year to find ways to tell them thank you and bless them in some appropriate moment and way.
To all of us I say, “Be blessed.  Be loved.  Be strengthened for the task.  Receive the blessing.  Happy Mother’s Day.”

DW  2013